Premarital Counseling

I was looking at Pastors.com this morning and there was a decent discussion going on between pastors about whether or not they will marry someone who is not affiliated with their congregation. There were pastors on both sides of the fence with various opinions in lots of directions on this topic.

Here's my take...

I insist that if a couple is interested in getting married at my church that they must:

1) Be equally yoked according to the Biblical examples
2) Submit to three pre-marital counseling sessions (the sessions may not be taken in the same week as the last session)
3) Attend worship together as a couple at my church at least three times prior to the ceremony

If they cannot abide with those three requirements then I suggest that they pursue other options. I am not very lenient when it comes to missing sessions either. In my years as a pastor I have backed out of more than one marriage because the couple has not followed through. It is a tough decision, but I think it is extremely important to follow your convictions.

One more thing, I do not charge for the counseling or the wedding service. I think that this is part of the job for a pastor. This is ministry in one of it's finest senses. I have personally led dozens of people to a saving relationship with Jesus Christ through the premarital counseling sessions. If they are coming to a pastor in a church to get married, it tells me that they want God to ordain their marriage. God must be in the premarital discussions!

I'm sure that many pastor's in this world would not agree with me. I'd like to hear from other pastor's as to how they handle this tickly issue...